The Fear (Part II)

Subjected to a suffocating routine altered only by the ruthless whip, driven by fear and distress, Beltrán was able to overcome himself and yield to whatever was required of him. Overcoming his fatigue and distress, growing in his effort and feeding on his terror, he was becoming, without wanting to, what the Lord thought and desired.

Beltrán did not feel the change, but the Lord did. Already on the third day of training, the animal project was responding very well. The whip was effective in its purpose: to subdue and make the animal project do what was expected of it.

And the Lord desired that Beltrán strengthen his resistance and physical capacity. The boy had a good body, was trained, but now was subjected to superior demands. Additionally, he was overcoming his weakness due to days of confinement without eating. The Lord began to feed him better, making him ingest proteins, vitamins, and calories, indignantly, but effectively. The poor boy appreciated this.

And that resistance and physical capacity could be seen in the time dedicated to running around the post inside the fence, with increasing speed. It was a good spectacle to see the boy completely naked, with a collar around his neck doing his demanding routine, with his body sweaty, dirty, and lacerated. His hair was dirty and facial hair was already evident.

The Lord had forbidden him from touching himself, and Beltrán obeyed, out of fear and because he had no desire for anything, only attentive to obeying and pleasing.

He did not speak, and tried, in his solitude, to establish imaginary conversations, trying to weave ideas and feelings, only to not go crazy. He imagined recounting his tragic story to his father and asking him to rescue him from this bitter situation, but then reconsidered and told himself, "No, I haven't said anything, I haven't said it, I don't think it, forgive me, forgive me."

And he said this because he thought he had said it out loud, but no, it was his mind inventing conversations that never existed.

The only voice was the Lord's, and it was heard clear and firm, and the orders were multiplying:

- Run 10 laps!

- Do 40 flexions!

- Execute 100 squats!

Beltrán obeyed and already understood that the whip would fall on his back with more force if he took too long. And if he performed what was ordered correctly and on time, the whip would be more benevolent, but not necessarily.

He did not shower, only was awakened with jets of water that the Lord launched. He ate on the ground and did his business in the same place, in recent dirty spots that he had to deposit in a septic pit located at one end of the enclosure. It stank, always. The dust stuck to his sweat, and his skin color was hiding under the dirt.

His hair was becoming matted, and he had a bad taste in his mouth. The water he drank tasted bad.

The soles of his feet, very hurt at first,...