I have thrown my life away

Today I’m stepping a little away from stories, because I want to reflect on something that I hope will help others.

I’m 50 years old... I don’t see myself as this age, I feel younger, but I am what I am. And I feel that getting married, having a heterosexual relationship, meant not living. I always say it, even if it doesn’t make sense, but I don’t care what people think. I don’t consider myself homosexual; however, I feel that I threw my life away by not starting to enjoy being a slave to men when I was young and taking advantage of my youth to look for a good master.

If you’re submissive, only a dominant man can lead you into total servitude, someone strong, dominant, alpha. And there’s nothing more comforting than finding someone like that and being the source of his pleasure and well-being. It’s like... it’s fucking perfection in relationships. Two guys understand each other, respect each other, and if you add the bond of domination and sex... fuck, it’s unbeatable!

That’s why, if you’re happy with a woman (that wasn’t my case, because my wife was a bitch; maybe I already chose her that way without realizing it), but you don’t feel fulfilled, and you’re attracted to trying it with a guy and you like dominant men, men who cancel you out, who are your owner, try it, try it! The first time, the second, the third will be shit, but if you let yourself go, if you open your mind, if you accept it, if you only see sex with your male as a gift you offer him, you give him your body, its holes, you swallow his fluids because if they are his, they are sacred—if you manage to enjoy it without taboos, it’s the best thing life will give you.

For me it came late, and now I’m no longer of an age to find a good master. I have things... but not what I’m looking for.