The three milks

It's Juan's birthday and I'm thinking of something to please him, to do something special for him. I know I shouldn't do it, he's done things that I don't like, but something inside me compels me to humiliate myself by doing something I shouldn't for someone I shouldn't. It makes me feel like shit, less of a man.

How can a masculine and normal guy like me plan a surprise for a man 15 years older than me who really causes me physical repulsion? Just thinking about it gets me excited... So I do what I know he likes the most and what I like the least. First, I plan a "romantic night" with him, I lie to him, I tell him I want to spend a night with him, just the two of us, with dinner, candles, and I want to be only his for that night, like lovers. His kisses that disgust me will be my punishment and his gift.

The next night, I've talked to his friend, we're going to have a party, the three of us, with something that they both like, bringing a stranger from Grindr to fuck me, use me, and they watch and then fuck me with the heat.

The night with Juan, I go out on Friday from Vito, I get dressed up, I put on perfume, I clean myself well, I fix my beard, he arrives and he's in pajamas... I bring him a bottle of wine, I enter and I kiss him with affection, searching for him, as if I were the one who desires him... He's already getting hot, he's taken his Viagra, he tells me, tonight you're only mine, he tells me, he's happy. We spend an evening like lovers, I'm his willing lover, serving him, cleaning, cooking, serving him, I get under the table in the middle of dinner and I give him a blowjob, I heat him up as much as I can. I get comfortable, I've bought a jockstrap as a surprise, I want to be accessible. He gets horny, we go to bed and he makes love to me, he doesn't fuck me, he makes love to me, I surrender to him, I receive his fluids in all my orifices, I feel dirty, used, and I don't shower, I want to sleep with that feeling of disgust and pleasure.

The next morning, we go to Haro, have a drink, spend the morning, I drink a bit more than I should. I tell him that Arturo is coming tonight, I see that he doesn't like the idea very much, I thought he would like it more, I tell him that we can look for an anonymous guy to fuck me, that's what I see he likes more, we haven't done it again since they did something that I didn't like and with that, we close the argument.

The only condition I set is that they don't blindfold me, I have to see what happens, although I recognize that not seeing or hearing anything while a stranger fucks me is an experience that I recommend, it feels the sex in a brutal way, besides the feeling of not being able to intervene while anyone fucks you is very gratifying for a submissive like me.

I continue working, at another time I'll tell you what happens at night.