Here is the fourth chapter of my first novel. If you want to know its ending and help this adventure continue, I invite you to read it through "Kindle unlimited" or get it on Amazon.

The book is published under the same title, making it easy to find. If you have any issues, doubts, or comments, you can contact me at the following email address: cachopowriter@gmail.com

Thanks to everyone for the comments and emails... and enjoy.

Ch. IV (part I)

ALEJANDRO

A few days after my promise to forget about men, I found myself with my ass full of cum, laughing at how sad my abstinence from cocks had been. It had lasted a miserable week.

In the first days of fighting the temptation to fuck, I forced myself to remember the discomfort I had felt every time one of those bastards ghosted me. I saw Isaac's face first, the janitor's laughter when I came without even touching myself, and then the faces of dozens of guys who had passed through my life. I even made a list of all the guys I had been excited about who had rejected me. Only on the list were the men who I thought liked me, even if only as their whore. A list of all the men who had fucked me was impossible. Not only due to the number of lovers (a very inappropriate word, as I believe none of them ever loved me), but also because I didn't know the names of most of the guys who had used me: contacts from web pages, cruising, saunas, sex bars... Once the list was made, I read it over and over again, reminding myself of my purpose. I felt worse every day, but at least I didn't give in to the temptation of posting an ad online or opening a profile on a dating app.

In reality, I think it would have been better if my latest disappointment didn't live right across from me. I spied on him and jerked off like a fifteen-year-old thinking about him. I would go to the kitchen in the dark and watch him eat, or sit while reading. I never understood why he read in the kitchen instead of the living room or the bed, although I assumed it was to escape his wife's nagging. I was just fooling myself. I still desired to be fucked by a guy who had rejected me, and on top of that, I punished myself by not fucking others.

And all my effort was ruined also because of Jaime. More specifically, it was to avoid him. Tired of spying on him like a lunatic, I decided to try not to run into him. I went to dinner at a kebab place near my house, so I wouldn't be home when Jaime had dinner with his wife. I ate quietly and drank a lot of beer. On one of my trips to the bathroom to empty my bladder, I saw two guys in their twenties looking at me and whispering. I didn't think much of it. But as I went back to relieve myself half an hour later, the two of them entered the bathroom after me. I looked at them, and I knew something was wrong when one of them stayed at the door and the other approached me with a smug look.